They see who we are capable of being, what we can accomplish, and inspire us to rise to the level of our true ability.
By challenging us to raise our standards, learn from failures, mistakes, and setbacks, push through our own glass ceilings, and persuading us to demonstrate impeccable character in the face of adversity. People who have the most influence are usually those who consistently encourage us to become better versions of ourselves. But be mindful of the fine line between acclaim and flattery, as fawning can turn a person off.
Make them feel important, and show admiration, but always do it earnestly.Įvery person seeks out sincere praise. In How to Win Friends and Influence People, author Dale Carnegie stresses how vital it is to compliment the person you are trying to persuade. Doing so will also bestow you with credibility and allow you to resolve their concern before giving them the chance to object. Nobody can expose your weaknesses in a better light than you. If there is an element of truth to any suspicion they may have, deal with it head-on. As soon as you injure their intention, they will become triggered and you will lose.
Confirm suspicions and acknowledge objectionsįirst and foremost, never make the other person wrong. The easiest way to persuade someone is by helping them persuade themselves.ĥ. Walk them through relatable emotional experiences but encourage them to take the lead in shaping the outcome and discover the answers for themselves. The most compelling way to teach a lesson is to inspire through storytelling, metaphors and analogies. People listen more effectively when you teach them how to make better choices, how to handle problems, and how to think about their lives and circumstances in a constructive and self-supporting way. Most influential people primarily impel others through teaching. Knowing the essence of a person will give you more influence, and if you fail to inspire, you probably didn't know what was truly driving them in the first place. You must take the time to fully understand their motivation at the deepest level. Remember that people don't do things for your reasons they do it for their reasons. The root answer never comes from the initial query, so dig deep. A great way to do this is to ask them a series of open-ended questions, then follow up with "why?" multiple times.
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